When Dreams Die

The house was large: I don’t know many that sport a four car garage.   It stood in the shadow of a hill, on a quiet street in a beloved town.  With a price tag of over a million dollars, it was likely to sit silent a while longer.  The lot was empty when I last visited, the house a dream that had yet to be put on paper.  

Residents say the couple moved to their town in order to build their dream home.  Without any real information, speculation and conjecture roam freely.  It should be noted both are deleterious and destructive.  All that is certain is by the time the dream house was standing, the relationship behind it was razed to the ground.  Divorce and relocation followed and now the house sits empty waiting for new love to fuel new dreams.

We walked by in the twilight as the crickets began their evensong, the sprinklers providing percussive accompaniment.  The scene was beautiful but the sadness was overwhelming.  The dream was achieved but the relationship behind it was gone.  

Quotes about dreams are endless, some are poignant and others are pure bunk; google it if you want to invest/waste some time.  I am convinced that dreams are tied in part to relationships.  Though dreaming is a solitary activity, it takes the investment of others to achieve them.  It seems there must be a balance between the two.

Christianese is a peculiar language.  One for the phrases endlessly repeated is life with Jesus “is all about relationship.”  Though true, I find the phrase unhelpful at times.  When I’m in the emergency room, lost in a phone tree trying to pay a bill and waiting for a friend to arrive to take a child to co-op, I’m not always sure what my “relationship with Jesus” has to do with anything. Though when I consider dreams and relationships, my uncertainty diminishes.

Webster’s defines dreams as “an idea or vision that is created in your imagination and that is not real” or “something that you have wanted very much to do, be, or have for a long time.”  Most of the connotations are positive.  We are encouraged to spend our lives making our dreams a reality.  The self-help section is filled with publications on the subject. The notion of fulfilling your dreams and changing your life is popular.  Those who are blessed to see the fulfillment of a dream can experience an elation and satisfaction that is life changing.  It is a rich and rewarding experience.

Not all dreams however, are taken from our hearts and brought to fruition. Many dreams are cast upon the shores of providence and are washed in on a tide of disappointment.  Other dreams die slowly as time and resources are reallocated.  When loss and grief pierce the silver lining of a dream, what is a body to do?  

I’m not certain where in Christianity the monstrous lie of a perfect life starts.  Many believe it is a side effect of prosperous churches.  Somehow we are entrenched in the notion that if we behave properly and honor the Lord, disaster will keep its distance.  Sadly nothing could be farther from the heart of the gospel.  Yet insidiously the belief persists until the storm clouds gather.  When misfortune strikes, our relationship with the Lord becomes strained.  We are faced with endless questions regarding His care, concern and character.  We are faced with the death of a dream and a confused relationship.  It is a heart-wrenching place to be.  

Dear friend, if clouds are crossing your skies could I remind you about a few things about your relationship with your Creator?

He is not confused.  Your heart ache and frustration with him does not cause Him discouragement.  He understands it completely.  He is not angry.  You might be furious and done with Him.  He is not done with you.  His wrath has been satisfied through the cross.  He will shore up the lack you are experiencing. Though you do not know to maintain your relationship with Him, He will see you through, He will remain faithful.  

Your relationship with the Lord is eternal.  Scripture paints a picture in the 49th chapter of Isaiah, discussing Israel He writes, 

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast

and have no compassion on the child she has borne?

Though she may forget, I will not forget you!

See, I have engraved you on the palm of my hands;

your walls are ever before me.

Isaiah 49:15-16

This the heart behind God’s relationship with His people: eternal and unfailing.  His grace is given freely, His forgiveness is given endlessly and is love is given relentlessly.  

Dreams are born, change with time, and perish.  Much like homes they are built, renovated, and disassembled over time. Unlike a dream that exists for a season, His relationship with you lasts beyond the grave.  This foundation gives us the ability to hope and dream again.

I’m thinking of you this week,

xoxKaren