Hello Friend!
Are you ready to go back to school? I’m not and frankly it has me a bit
blue. In an effort to encourage myself,
I meandered through the bible in a haphazard manner, claiming promises and
misapplying verses to my situation in an effort to feel better. When that didn’t work I marched over to the
Psalms and pronounced doom over a few individuals that have been vexing me
severely. When none of that stuck
(utterly shocking I agree) I picked up my bible study and waltzed smack into
one of the most disagreeable bible stories the bible has to offer. I was really having a morning.
For the past week I have been unable to shake the story
of Leah, found in Genesis 29**. If you
aren’t familiar with it, I’d like to apologize because it isn’t light reading. Within a few verses you will wonder what on
earth was wrong with Jacob’s family and how anyone as twisted as Laban could
make it into a bible story. I find it comforting because although I’ve never manipulated
anyone into hard labor for 14 years, I did make my 12 year old clean her
bathroom the other day and I’m glad the bible still has something to say to the
likes of me.
In the narrative Jacob falls in love with Rachel and
agrees to work for her father Laban for 7 years in exchange for permission to
marry. The night of the wedding, Laban places
Leah, Rachel’s’ older sister, in the marriage bed and sets the scene for a decidedly
horrible outcome. The story continues
with enmity sewn into the entire polygamous situation. It’s sad and disturbing and upsetting. God continues to bless those in the story but
as in many cases, Leah doesn’t get delivered out of her difficult
situation.
I have read this story many times and tried to imagine
it from the point of view of all the major characters. Today I’ve considered the story from Leah’s
point of view because recently I have been placed in the role of the “unwanted”
character in a circumstance that has played out around me. I keep wondering if there was anything I
could have done to avoid the role as villain, but I’m not certain we always get
to choose our roles.
Circumstance and sin are a lethal combination. For Leah, the manipulation of her father
placed her in a circumstance from which she would never escape. Both her husband and her sister viewed her as
unwanted and treated her as such. Scripture
says that Leah was unloved, though the concordance uses the word “hated.” Those are strong words. Have you ever been desperate for the love or
approval of another? Only to be hated and despised for your efforts?
Faith in God is tested when we are despised by others
for reasons that lie beyond our ability to fix.
In fact, our efforts to fix things in such circumstances often make
people like us even less. Such
circumstances are desperately unfair. So
what am I supposed to do when someone doesn’t like me, doesn’t want to like me
and is brazen enough to advertise the fact?
(Hint: You aren’t allowed to run them over with your car. I’ve suggested it - apparently it's a no go.)
Over the past decade, circumstance has made me a few enemies. Try as I might, these delightful people had
no desire to live at peace with me. At
first the situation was devastating because I dislike conflict. I assumed that as believers, we would have a
civil conversation to try to make our way through points of disagreement. Wrong.
When someone wants to paint you as the “bad guy” you are playing a vital
role in their world. The first thing I
had to do was let go of the desire to be loved and focus on honoring the Lord
instead.
This is a lot harder than it sounds. At first I did a large amount of ignoring my
snake of an opponent and crying. Blessedly, I had some lovely prayer people who
tended to my wounds and listened to my endless list of complaints. As time passed and I practiced the discipline
of treating my enemies biblically, it hurt less…mostly. There was that month I went out of my way to
ask my enemy the time whenever we were together in a group setting to see if
she would ignore me: but I view that time as a maturation period. Additionally,
I could mention the time I parked behind her car and pulled in so closely she
couldn’t open her hatchback but it hardly seems relevant right now.
The difficult part about Christianity is that it comes
with some fine print.
But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that
curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully
use you, and persecute you; Matt 5:44
So my friend, I’m praying for you if you have an enemy
or two who are bent on unjustly mistreating you. Praying that you might have the grace to do
what the bible suggests and pray for their unkind souls. That as you give yourself to the discipline
of prayer, you might care less about their meanness and more about their
mindset. And that in discovering their
weakness, you might pray for the Lord to heal what is broken and rise far above
the chains that bind you to hatred and pain.
Like Leah, you might see your enemy coming and say, “This time I will
praise the Lord.”
Let's not kid ourselves, I think Leah was still treated poorly and I expect some days it really got up her nose. But somewhere in the process of being hated, Leah learned that God was worthy of her trust and her thanks. Something about his goodness, eclipsed the ugly behavior of those around her. I can't help but think that now, as in the past, the ability to see beauty when things around us are ugly is a skill worth learning.
I’m thinking of you this week.
xoxKaren
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